Love Lives Here

The sign that we have in our front yard: “Love Lives Here.”

I like seeing us as a society being united. This happens when we are more loving towards one another. But this is not just empty and nice-sounding words. To me, it means something specific. It means tolerance and positive action. Tolerance is taking full responsibility for one’s life, and that is why I say “Love Lives Here,” because I will be the first to say that if I want the world to be loving, I have to be caring. I do that by taking full responsibility for my life and not blaming the world and criticizing others.

This does not mean tolerating mean and abusive behavior. From a place of strength, the positive course forward is more obvious. So the second part of this is being clear about what we want and who we want to be. We can take positive actions even in the face of challenges, but in those cases, our actions are motivated not by hate but by love. Love will see and seek the best outcome.

Hate Has a Home Here?

I was inspired to make this sign because years ago, I saw the signs “Hate Has No Home Here” in people’s yards. I want to say upfront that this is not about politics. I am not a republican, nor am I a democrat.

I Agree in Spirit? I think?

I don't know what their signs mean, but they convey a desire for the world to be a better place. And I always like seeing the world be better, and on that I can agree. I also do not want to imply that I am criticising the people who have these signs. Instead, I am gently suggesting we can do better. I, too, like a better world. At the same time, their approach may have the opposite effect.

What Do Those Signs Mean?

The first thing that came to mind was, “What do their signs even mean?” I do not understand. I think it has something to do with these people hating President Trump, but I am not sure. That’s the first problem. For the record, this is not about whether I approve of President Trump. That’s your decision.

A Clear Call To Positive Action

I once heard Obama say that one of his biggest challenges as a president was that people would come to him and say, “There is this problem.” To which he would say, “Of course!" but at the same time, “We all know that.”

The question is “What is the solution and who is going to follow through on it?” It’s much more helpful to present positive solutions. What do you want to see? What do you want to happen? What specific action should people be taking after reading those signs? Not doing something negative is not an explicit action.

Hypocrisy #1

I found these signs confusing because they say “Hate has no home here,” when they literally have a sign of hate in their front yards.

Hypocrisy #2

I am not sure of the intent of these signs, as I mentioned, but I don’t think these people were trying to say that they love President Trump. Instead, they seem to hate hate.

I am Afraid

I am afraid to write this post because I am scared that I will be hated for having a different opinion about the best path forward. I am so scared that I will be hated because these people think that I am criticising them or somehow a secret conspiracy supporter of some political cause. I do not feel that I will be loved. I believe that I will be hated. I don’t think that I would be warmly accepted into these households if I disagreed with their point of view.

There Is No One Truth

Another problem is that there is no “one truth.” The ultimate truth is that all truths are true. No two people will ever agree because everyone has a unique perspective. The ultimate truth is that all truths are true. People fight for “one truth,” but it should be evident that everyone has their own unique perspective.

What is Good and Evil?

Part of this comes back to the question of what is good and what is evil? I once heard someone describe evil as a loose concept, akin to a separate force. It is a force that seeks to present, highlight, and create differences, thereby fostering separation. It implies that there is a 'me versus you' and 'us versus them' dynamic. To me, the “Hate Has No Home Here” is not a sign that encourages unity, but rather one that promotes separation by saying, “Do what we like and we will love you, and don’t and we will hate you.” Like I said, I don’t really know what they mean, and that’s part of the problem.

I’m not sure what their intent is, and I doubt it is to encourage separation. Nevertheless, I think that’s what the sign is unintentionally doing.

Needing Others To Change

The other implication to me is that these signs imply that others need to change. The sign suggests that others are responsible for the world's problems. It’s the world “out there” that needs to change. In this way, they do not take full responsibility for their lives.

To me, we are the world out there to others, and if we want the world to change, it starts with me.

All feelings come from beliefs. No one can ever do enough to make you truly happy. Every single feeling we have is rooted in a belief we hold. If we feel bad, it’s always because we have a negative and disempowering belief that we are expressing. To change that, we have to find new empowering beliefs that feel good and act upon those. This is not through blame and criticism, but by looking in the mirror.

Asking others to change is giving them power. When you need the world to change to make you happy, then you’ve lost, because you can’t control the world. Instead, you are actually empowering the person or thing that you feel negative about. It has no power unless we give it power. We give something power by focusing on it.

Love Lives Here

My overall suggestion, and what I will do first myself, is to be tolerant. As I mentioned before, this does not mean allowing “bad” things to happen, but rather about taking full responsibility for my life and my feelings. If I feel bad, it’s my problem first. I can handle you and your negativity. I welcome it. I control my life and my reality because I own my feelings. I am not blaming you for how I feel. You have no power over that. You will be loved in my home regardless of your perspective. I will place positive labels on people.

As I mentioned, this does not mean tolerating harmful and abusive behavior in others. From a place of love, acceptance, and power, we can see and take a positive path forward. We don’t let the baby have a gun, but that’s not out of hate; it’s out of love. The key characteristic is that the action is taken from a place of love, rather than anger and hate.

The second thing is that I intend to take explicit positive action in my life. Positive action is not about “stopping” someone else; it’s about a clear course of action forward. One that encourages individual responsibility and allows others to be themselves. Talk about what you want to see, not what you don’t, and be the first person to take that step.