Do People Change?
A photo of my son at 2 years old with our Golden Retriever Roxy.
We often wish that others might change. But do other people? Can they change?
The reality is that life is always changing. Change is one of the few true laws of existence. If people do not seem to change, it is because they are holding onto the same beliefs repeatedly. This is true for others as it is for us. Hoping for a different life does not happen unless you change your beliefs and act upon them.
But when it comes to other people and people we love, why do we want them to change? One major reason is that they are making our lives difficult. When we think this way, however, it is our own problem.
We are blaming them for our own lack of happiness. We are holding them accountable for “making our lives difficult.” We are not loving and accepting them for who they are. Unconditionally loving means accepting them for who they are, not who we wish them to be.
Another major reason that we want people to change, and it might even be related to the first, is that we want them to be happier. We can achieve this by being happier ourselves. When we unconditionally love someone, we also bring out more of their bright side. Think about how you are a different person when you're around different people. The same is true of others. Certain people bring out the best in us. So you too can bring out the best in others by your approach.
In both cases, the solution is to:
Love unconditionally
Take responsibility for our own lives by finding our own happiness
Unconditional love is a uniting force. This is more than simply nice words. When we allow a person to be who they are, we can see through the fog and find more ways to connect. Remember, darkness is not a thing. It is the absence of light. Shine a light on someone, and you will see more of them. They will see more of themselves if they choose to do. But do it out of love, not out of a need to change them.
